Whopper Virgins

OK, this isn't the Whopper Virgins picture.

Here's the full "documentary"



Stacy Peralta, legendary skateboarder, directed this series, but I'm going to chalk up the crappy marketing effort to whoever is handling this account now.

A better version here
Creepy King continues to skeeve me out.

Quarter Pounder Restaurants

Stand alone "Quarter Pounder" Restaurants are popping up in Japan--probably to promote the QP, a distinctly American burger, that does not regularly appear on Japanese McDonald's menus!

Used to love DQP w cheese. Now it's Big Macs every time!

But wait! it's a big secret! Shhhh!
http://www.quarter-pounder.net/campaign/index.html


via http://xo.typepad.com/

Carl's Jr Natural Cut Fries Are Awful

They Suck.

Criss Cut fries get old, quick:

http://brandeating.blogspot.com/2008/07/carls-jrs-criss-cut-french-fries.html

Zucchini is a nice alternative, but i just want salt and potatoes!!

Uncrustables are Worse than Not Eating

Sorry, Smuckers. These bastard sandwiches are for lazy people. Not just people who are too busy but for those with money to waste and no sense of economy or taste!

It's a frickin peanut butter sandwich--premade. They serve these in county jail, according to a former co-worker who was on work furlough. Even the inmates didn't like them very much!

Thaw peanut butter? It just sounds wrong

The "bread" is supposed to be soft enough where kids don't think there is a crust--hence Uncrustables. Arguably, crusts aren't the best part of a sandwich, but really, this whole thing is crust. The bread was almost rubbery. More like Unedibles.

But how lazy do you have to be to not have time to make a f-ing peanut butter sandwich? Get out bread 4.6 seconds, dip knife into peanut butter jar, 2.1 seconds, spread peanut butter. PB could be slightly cool so doesn't spread easily immediately, so being generous, 10 seconds to spread. Jelly optional and easier to spread, say 8 seconds. Put other half of bread on top 1 second. Less than 30 seconds for sure. If you have to make 2 sandwiches, then it's only a few more seconds to spread more PB.

Lets just say that my kids who will eat Peanut Butter sandwiches just about anytime won't even eat these horrible things. The "grilled cheese" style is also awful and the toaster pocket works for crap.


Don't even have to mention how environmentally wasteful these are either with two layers of packaging. It's just a product for lazy people who don't care what food tastes like. I feel sorry for not only the kids who have to eat these but for the lazy morons who think they are saving any time at all by buying Uncrustables.

Bring Back Super Size!

I'll need 200 hundred ketchup packets please!

HUGE MAC!

Coke-lore!

Like folklore, only with Coke!



From the Coke web site

Coca-Cola® and Santa Claus

Most people can agree on what Santa Claus looks like -- jolly, with a red suit and a white beard. But he did not always look that way, and Coca-Cola® advertising actually helped shape this modern-day image of Santa.

2006 marked the 75th anniversary of the famous Coca-Cola Santa Claus. Starting in 1931, magazine ads for Coca-Cola featured St. Nick as a kind, jolly man in a red suit. Because magazines were so widely viewed, and because this image of Santa appeared for more than three decades, the image of Santa most people have today is largely based on Coke's advertising.



It's a common misconception that Santa wears a red coat because red is the color of Coca-Cola. In fact, Santa appeared in a red coat before artist Haddon Sundblom painted him for Coca-Cola advertising.

People loved the Coca-Cola Santa images and paid such close attention to them, that when anything changed, they sent letters to The Coca-Cola Company. One year, Santa's large belt was backwards (perhaps because artist Haddon Sundblom used himself as a model and painted by looking in a mirror). Another year, Santa Claus appeared without a wedding ring, causing fans to write asking what happened to Mrs. Claus.

Artist Haddon Sundblom used himself as a model for the Coca-Cola Santa.In the beginning, artist Haddon Sundblom painted the image of Santa using a live model -- his friend, Lou Prentiss, a retired salesman. When Prentiss passed away, Sundblom used himself as a model, painting while looking into a mirror. After the 1930s, he used photographs to create the image of St. Nick.



The children who appear with Santa Claus in Haddon Sundlbom’s paintings were based on Sundblom's neighbors. However, the neighbors were both girls, and Sundblom simply changed one to a boy in his paintings!

Dollar Menu - Will the Double Cheeseburger Cost more than a buck?

Personally, I have eaten a mountain of these burgers. Not so healthy you say? I'm not eating them to improve my health--I'm just in the cross hairs for the double cheeseburger demographic--poor & hungry! $5 gets you 3 double cheeseburgers & a large drink. Easily 2x the food of most fast food combos for about a buck less. you do the math.



As recently as April 2006, the New York Times was crowing about how the Dollar Menu helped steer McDonald's out of a long slide downward, especially after the release of this hack's pseudo-documentary 'Supersize Me'.

"The enormous success of the Dollar Menu, where all items cost $1, has helped stimulate 36 consecutive months of sales growth at stores open at least a year. In three years, revenue has increased by 33 percent and its shares have rocketed 170 percent, a remarkable turnaround for a company that only four years ago seemed to be going nowhere."

So... now the Golden Arches are trying to find cost cutting methods. Like only using one slice of cheese or replacing it with double hamburgers (no cheese).

Would you rather pay $1 for a Double burger with cheese or wd you cough up another 29¢ ? Some McDonalds dont even participate in teh Dollar Menu, and some regional restaurants are already making the burgers $1.09, $1.19 or $1.29...

Reese's Dark Knight

Not bad candy, but low chocolate-to-peanut butter ratio. More dark chocolate would have made this really really good, but it was kinda dry as well.

The shape was so-so--the package had squared corners and the actual bar was rounded. Not sure i woulda recognized the bat symbol if the package wasn't right there!

Double Half Low Carb McChicken

Step 1
Get a mcchicken sandwich




Step 2 Ditch that dry extra bun





















Step 3 Tear the new open-faced sandwich in half



Step 4 Double stack it.




Step 5 Profit!

Chicken Pepperoni!

French Fry Holder

French Fry Holder

Hold Your Fries In Your Car's Cup Holder !

French-Fry Holder holds one order of fries (and its cardboard container) close at hand!
Even has a clip-on ketchup cup!

Can also hold snacks or crayons. Fits into virtually any-size cup holder, with a no-slip rubberized base grip to help it stay in place. Dishwasher-safe.

Paying - Tips and Tricks of the Trade

Carl's Jr was one of the first quick serve places to add payment options with Credit, Debit and ATM cards. Most of the major players accept them now, too. But Carl's jumped in a bit early by including ATM functions with their POS machines, essentially making each register a virtual ATM!

This rocks, of course, because we can't always carry enough cash , plus we can combine two trips! However, Carl's did this initially because there is a 75¢ transaction fee for all debit & ATM card purchases.

Smart enough, but not smart enough to fool Chef Jef!

If you pay with a debit card & don't need cash back, always choose the "Credit" option. No fee for credit cards.

McDoanlds Southern Style Chicken Muffin sandwich

That was really annoying, and it looked like they filmed it at Pierce College in the cafeteria.

Definitely competing with Chik-Fil-A here, this is basicaly the original Chik-Fil-A sandwich for breakfast, minus the pickles.

They have a lunch version with a whole bunch of pickles on a buttered sesame seed bun, but the breakfast sandwich comes on a biscuit with butter only. It's been described as dry but good.

Want a Coupon for a free one May 15 with purchase of a large or medium drink?

Fast Food Capital of Texas?

Atascocita Texas claims to be the fast food capital of Texas...


Sounds like a fishy claim.

California has the most total places to eat - 87,225 dining establishments (2006 source here). New York State comes in at about 2/3 of that with 58,027. The top five states include Texas (53,631), Florida (41,901) Pennsylvania (31,466).
In terms of per capita per state, Washington DC tops the list according to National Restaurant Association . The US capital region boosts some 0.4 restaurants per 100 people.

Second is, surprisingly, Montana at .354 restaurants per 100 people. The NRA’s top five states are Rhode Island (0.304 per 100) Vermont (.303 per 100) New York (.301 per 100). If you are a little hungry you might want avoid the three states with the fewest restaurants Mississippi, Kentucky and Utah.

In terms of North American cities, it is a little harder to ascertain who can claim the title of city with most restaurants per capita.

Here are some cities with more than 100,000 people that have made the claim.

The city of San Francisco is a city of 744,230 people and claims to have 2,662 restaurants within the city boundaries. Thats 1,667 people per restaurant.

Victoria, BC.
This city on Vancouver Island and capital city of British Columbia, Canada regularly makes the claim that it has the “second highest number of restaurants per capita,” That means Victoria has a restaurant per 1,264 people.

On average, the city of New York can claim 6,650 dining places from the chic hot spots to the greasiest corner diners -- the most restaurants in any one place on the continent. Yet with 8,168,338 people, New York can only claim to have 1, 228 people per restaurant.

Austin Texas’s burgeoning population is currently 690, 252 making their people to restaurant ratio 634.

Louisville, KY has 1,089 restaurants. 510 people per restaurant.

A respectable 437 restaurants for 221,551 people in the Madison Wisconsin area, comes in at 504 people per.

Dallas, Texas’ third largest city ranks at 469 people per restaurant, making this city the winner of the title “City With The Most Restaurants per Capita.” take that Atascocita!


*reasearch via Kevin Field http://www.citybloc.com

Ketchup Packets Explained - Tips and Tricks of the Trade

The traditional fast food ketchup packet has remained virtually unchanged for many years. The art of opening them correctly is complex and requires many years of intense training and practice.

Or you just follow the printed instructions! "Tear Here"

Major chains always have Heinz ketchup, (the Dom Perignon of ketchup, IMO) and the ends are serrated to make them easier to open. The major mistake people make when opening ketchup is to just tear the package without removing a portion of the packing!

Start with clean, dry hands. Greasy fingers slip. Flatten the top of the package so the contents squeeze to the bottom away from the top corner. Tear from the center to the side along the dotted line--a smaller tear gets you a more focused stream.

To maximize output, position the opening over your target, hold the bottom edge and flatten the end with thumb and forefinger of other hand and slide up until all the ketchup is out.

Would You Like Fries With That?

How may I help you? Would you like French Fries with that?


Familiar phrases when you go to a fast food restaurant--or a "quick service" chain as they like to be called nowadays...
And for the most part, we all go there. We have to stop in and we take full advantage of all that fast food places have to offer, from convenient location to dollar menus to huge sodas.
I am not going to rail against fast food--Morgan Spermlock can kiss my ass. I LOVED super sizing my Big Mac meal... thanks for ruining a good thing in the name of filmmaking.
So i guess there will be some rants, mostly against the Super Size Me type of backlash against McDonald's et al.
Maybe some good eats, some handy tips and tricks for ordering and eating fast food.
Bon apetit!

~Chef Jef